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Jun 10

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Die Bitch

Have you ever loved a woman who turned out to be a black hearted vermin?

and seen her break your heart into multiple pieces, after you handed it to her on a platter?

and then, you collected all the pieces, stapled them together, and meekly submerged it in the tar of her love again?

 

Sometimes… she pierced it so hard, blood spat out like venom from a serpent’s fangs

and you plugged the holes with whatever you had, it hurt so much, and you wished you were stronger..

 

Eventually, you lost all but one fragment of hope, and all your gargantuan love hung off it perilously.

Once again, you wished, you were stronger..

 

Have you ever seen a man crying in a public bathroom, resting his head on the dirty mirror?

His fists are clenched and his shirt is stained, shoes undone and blood dripping off his arm

His tears have formed brown trails on the glass,  a squalid pool lies beneath them,

This guy has a relentless mortgage, you know. All his hope just drains down the toilet

 

Half his mind is contemplating suicide, the other half a public massacre,

He is angry at himself, but also enraged against humanity and what has become of this world,

He would literally give an arm and a leg for a bowl of cereal in his mother’s lap right now,

You wish you could go up to him and hand him a half-used crayon and say “its all right.”

And once again, you wished, you were stronger.

 

Have you noticed a stray dog in the streets of New York, licking an open wound?

You wonder if it licks the wound to heal it, or because it likes the taste of its own blood.

You can see its rabid skin, stretched around its brittle ribs, and foam seething off its mouth,

and after it’s done with the licking and gnawing, it looks up to the sky with hope,

and immediately thereafter pokes its nose into the drain to garner its daily dose of squalor.

You wonder why it looks at the sky, and what it hopes for, and then why it looks back into the drain,

and how hopelessly hopeless of a being it is,

and what does it (if it can) think every morning when it wakes up?

You feel like slapping the kid who troubles the dog and feeding his five-pound hamburger to it,

And, once again, you wished you were stronger.

 

For all of the sad and miserable people and beings that exist in the world, one thing stands true:

There is a way they can be happy again, there is a thing that could mend most, if not all.

But what about you, who won’t be happy even if you got the love of the fiendish woman you loved?

You know deep down that all the things you’ve lost in her pursuit weigh much more

than the joy you would get when you kiss her on a rainy evening, while walking under the same umbrella,

And you know  that her desensitizing smile can’t extirpate all the eternal sorrow that’s embedded in your heart,

that she will one day change her mind about you for someone with a tattoo and a circumcision,

and you wish with all you heart that you could stop submitting your soul the distress of her whimsical desires…

And, once again, you wished you were stronger.



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